Thursday, March 20, 2014

Aunt Ida

Wherein two merry widows set off to see the world.

Did I ever tell you about the time Aunt Ida set off on vacation?  

Ida get to Kingsport, look around a bit and think, "It's not New York, but it is a sight better 'n the Mountain.  She find a job right quick-like, an' a room in a boardin' house.  Waal, Ida were sharp, an' most afore you could say "Jack-in-the-Box," she had married.  She married good, too, on account a though the man were a bit older 'n Ida, he were right well to do.  Widower, he were, lived at the top of the city.  He din't have kids, but he had money.  Lots a money.

Well, sir, tragedy strike whoever it want, and here tragedy struck.  First off, Ida and Paul try to have chil'ren, and it look like it will happen, but the girl miscarry.  An' yet again it happen.  Then Paul drivin' in to work one mornin', same road he always take, beautiful mornin', but a truck comin' through from the left T-bone Paul's car.  Kill him outright.

Anyway, after while Ida an' her friend, Laura Biggs, Laura were a flatlander, come up from Columbia, I think it were, they decide to take a extended vacation.  Ida go downtown and buy a spankin' new Hupmobile.  The girls pin  a big roadmap the Yew-ess-ay on the wall.  Laura blindfold Ida, spin her around three times, and aim her at th' map.  Jus' like Pin the Tail on the Donkey, Ida stagger to the map and stick a straight pin in it.  Pin stick smack dab in th' middle a Lake Erie.

Waal, the girls pack up they car and head on out. They drive on up to Cleveland, leisurely, doncha know.  They warn't in a hurry.  Taken in the sights along the way.  So they get to the shores a Lake Erie an' behol' it to be a ocean, so far's they can see!

It din't take the girls long to find that fun were awaitin' at Cedar P'int, so they head westward along the lake.  Arrivin' at the park, they decide to do a run-through to see what's hit all about.  Well, sir, one afternoon 'n they get hooked on them roller coasters.  Never had so much fun in they lives.

Ida says, "We got to find us a place to stay tonight so's we can do this again tomorrow."

And they did.

© 2014 David W. Lacy


Sharkbytes said...

These are so great! And you've got the voice for the audio part, too.

Shelly said...

Love this. Before Thelma and Louise were their much gentler counterparts, Ida and Laura.

vanilla said...

Sharkey, I thank you. Didn't have to alter my voice, either. Well, the grammar, perhaps.

Shelly, "gentler"? I thought Thelma and Louise were rather mean. Suicidal, too, as I recall.

Grace said...

Fun, as always. (I didn't think much of Thelma and Louise either - am I the only woman on the planet who thought they were annoying jerks...)

vanilla said...

Grace, I'm looking forward to more of Ida's adventures. Pretty sure they'll be nothing like those of Thelma and Louise.