Tuesday, June 24, 2014

When It's Hot It's Hot

From time to time I share a sign our local jeweler posts outside his place of business.

Now read this one and chuckle. Then read my take on it.

This rises to the level of "wrong" in so many ways I am not sure I can parse it correctly.  There are so many double entendres and possible warped interpretations, and yet one supposes that the message that there our diamonds for sale within is conveyed.

First, and I think of my Beautiful Beloved Better Half as I write this, one does not want to "set off her fireworks."  Possibly the writer of the sign's blurb had something else in mind.

Then I think of "hot" as a descriptor of diamonds, and perhaps I have read too many detective stories, but "hot diamonds" generally are not something one wants to be "caught" with.  Too, diamonds, both legitimate and "hot" are often referred to as "ice."  Well, there is a conundrum.

I do believe, though, that were BBBH to receive a new diamond her eyes would light up.  She is definitely a member of the "Ooh! Shiny" School of Esthetics.

Perhaps I should stop in.  If they truly have hot diamonds, maybe they could cut me a deal.

7 comments:

Grace said...

Yeah, that sign doesn't work for me either...

vanilla said...

Grace, something off there, for sure.

Lin said...

"Hot" to me means stolen. I don't think I want those sorts of fireworks. You know, with the cops chasin' me and all.

Vee said...

The sign may not work but diamonds always work in favor of the giver of such. Maybe a carat for Better Half? I might get a carrot or two from my Hubby. Maybe even a whole bag. (I prefer them in slaw, so I'll take them cold.)

vanilla said...

Lin, that was pretty much one of the scenarios running through my mental projector.

Vee, very funny. BBBH is much more likely to get the sort of carrots that you put in your slaw.

Secondary Roads said...

It is fun to roll the possibilities around in one's mind.

One company advertised: "Diamonds -- render her speechless." One wag translated that as, "Diamonds -- that will shut her up."

vanilla said...

Chuck, I believe it, if you discount the squealing~