Saturday, May 29, 2010

Unfriending the Grandkids

Has this happened to you? You receive a facebook friend request from a grandchild. You are so excited! Suzy or Bubba thinks enough of Grammy or Gramps to invite them into their space; so of course, you become friends.

Then the little imp's posts begin to appear on your page. It is not long before your embarrassment becomes just too much, so you "unfriend" the little snipe*.

I love you dearly, but your gutter-mind and rude language is just simply not going to appear before my other friends. You're clearly not ashamed of yourself, so I'll be ashamed for you. And yes, this hurts me more than it does you. Literally, for you won't care and yet I love you so much.

What is happening to our society is truly astonishing and heart-breaking.

*To date, this has happened only with adult grandchildren. I hope the younger ones do not follow in these footsteps.


Secondary Roads said...

Now I understand better what you were saying the other day. It is sad to see the coarsening of our society and culture all the more so when it is that close to home.

jimgrey said...


Grace said...

I unfriended my stepchildren - they are all adults, aged late 20's to early 30's, for similar reasons. I don't need to know how much they are drinking or what other stupid things they are doing. I miss being able to see some of their pictures tho. Since we all live all over the country it would have been nice to stay in touch through FB but I don't need the angst.

vanilla said...

And, Chuck, it seems as though this sort of thing is rapidly becoming (or already is) the norm for social interaction. Sad.

Right, Jim. Ouch indeed.

Grace, it is astounding the personal information young people put out there for anyone to see. Unbelievable, and heartbreaking.

Vee said...

FLIP SIDE OF THIS ISSUE: Unless it is a personal post that has been typed on your profile, the only other ones besides you who can see the FB posts are friends that you share with them. Those people will continue to see the posts anyway. None of your other friends can even see the posts. Elvin was going to "hide" or "unfriend" someone because of posts that offended him, but it is someone we pray for every day. We talked about it and decided that unfriending him would in no way influence him for good. A couple of young family members and several who were young people in churches where Elvin pastored (and no longer are a part of the church) post things that make us say, "Whoa!" But then when they post about a problem in their lives, we pray for them and then leave them a post stating that. I hope our posts help them to know that we care about them and that God loves them. (Since we post that we are praying on profile pages, someone may decide to unfriend us so their friends don't know they have someone praying for them - but that hasn't happened yet.)

Bad language is offensive and rude. I don't use it but I love many family/friends who do, and God loves them all.

vanilla said...

Vee, "whoa!" is often my reaction to some of the stuff people put up, yet I don't necessarily "unfriend" them. Certain excessive language, though, is just too much.

And I agree with you: God loves them anyway, and so do I. But they are still off the page.