Tuesday, November 7, 2017

I Might Have Said

Setting:  A decent restaurant, surrounded by 30 friends, eating good food and engaging in scintillating conversation.

Climax:  BBBH is placing a few morsels in the styrofoam take-home box.

Listen in.

BBBH:  Have to take a goodie home to my doggie.

J (across the table):  People food is not good for dogs.

vanilla (either because he knows everything, or because he rushes to his wife's defense): Dogs are omnivores.  Their digestive systems will handle just about anything ours will handle.  Cats, on the other hand (now he is in the TMI mode) are carnivores and their systems are designed to handle only meats.

J:  I have a friend in Florida who has a beautiful retriever that was not well.  She took the dog to the vet who told her that she should never under any circumstances allow the dog to have people food because it is not good for them.

vanilla:  (Oh, really?  Most people eat people-food that is not good for them, either.  Consider that chocolate cake there on your plate, for instance.)

 [The above is in parentheses because I did not say that, because, in fact, I only thought of it twelve hours later when I should have been sound asleep.  Dang, why does that happen to me?]


Sharkbytes said...

Probably better that you left off the chocolate cake reference! I've had dogs my whole life who ate a lot of the things on the list they say you shouldn't give them. What's up with that? We had one dog that would bark and bark and cry until dad gave him a raw potato from the garden at that time of the year. I've had two dogs eat enough chocolate they should have been dead by modern calculations. Both got sick, but if I'd eaten that much chocolate I'd have been sick too.

vanilla said...

Sharkey, "What's up with that?" The Pet Food Cartel, or cabal, that's what's up with that. Americans spend more that 23 billion dollars per annum on pet food.

Vee said...

"I should have said ..." is used regularly in our family. Usually we shouldn't have, but it makes us feel better to think of a snide response. Interestingly, the scripture verse posted by my Bible app. today is Proverbs 13:3. "He that keepeth his mouth keepeth his life; but he that openeth wide his lips shall have destruction." : )

As for the dog food, that designer stuff may be what keeps Vets in business. We had our dog on prescription food, but she mopped up everything the grandkids dropped on the floor. That's probably what kept her alive.

vanilla said...

Vee, and there is Proverbs 18:21 - “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof." This I came across in my reading another post shortly after I read yours. Maybe God is trying to tell me something.

Secondary Roads said...

A book that I am currently reading begins with this quotation:
"The storm had now definitely abated, and what thunder there was now grumbled over more distant hills, like a mand saying 'and another thing . . .' twenty minutes after admitting he lost the argument.

Secondary Roads said...

It should be man not mand.

vanilla said...

Chuck, I believe that not saying the 'nother thing may have saved my life. On more than one occasion. Your mileage may vary.

Lin said...

You are lucky (wise?) not to have added the extra sentence. My problem is that I think of it...and then I say it...regretting it in the wee hour. Someday I will learn to keep the trap shut.

Problem is eating a full meal of pet food and then eating a full meal of human food. Like humans, pets don't always know when to stop eating. Everything in moderation, right? And lots of exercise in the meantime. I guess the girth of said person or animal should be the marker of consumption.

vanilla said...

Lin, so the delayed response syndrome with which I am endowed is actually my brain protecting me from blurting out unfiltered witty remarks?

I agree with the "everything in moderation" dictum, and I would include exercise in the everything!