Saturday, January 18, 2014

Double Aggravaton

When a shirt is placed on a hanger the top button must be fastened.
--Rules of the Laundry According to She Who Must Be Obeyed.

I do not fasten the top shirt button when I wear the shirt, yet I must follow this protocol which inflicts double aggravation upon me, to wit, the aggravation of buttoning the button when the shirt is hangered and the further grief I experience when I want to wear the shirt and have to unfasten the thing.

One might think, quite incorrectly as it turns out, that the fact that I do laundry, fold clothes, and hang shirts and trousers would be quite enough.  No-o-o.  I must do it according to the rules as established by SWMBO.

Really, I have no room for complaint, for even as I record this little diatribe, she prepares my dinner. Were it not for her cooking, I'd pretty much be reduced to canned soup and cold-cut sandwiches. And her cooking is well-worth the effort it takes for me to button a couple of collars.  And then some.

Thank you, BBBH!


Vee said...

Of course, she is right on this one. There are, or at least must be, many arguments for doing so since that is a laundry rule at our house, also.

Lin said...

Yeah, but I hate that little top's so HARD to fasten! And it is usually smaller and that little hole.....


I do the second one to get it to hang on the hanger better. That way you can slip it off the hanger without a lot of fuss.

I've got all sorts of funky rules too, I'm sure. Just ask Joe.

vanilla said...

Vee, why am I not surprised that you also enforce this rule?

Lin, so you do feel my pain. I tried getting away with the second button. Nope.

Grace said...

BBBH is quite correct - when I laundered my husband's 'button' shirts I always fastened the top, middle and bottom buttons. Years ago we decided that my time was worth more than what it cost to send his dress shirts to the laundry and I have no idea which buttons they fasten - probably all of them. I could go look...My husband lives in his LL Bean pocket tees - long sleeve in the Winter, short sleeves in the Summer. I fold them in the standard retail store configuration. Force of habit.

Secondary Roads said...

We don't have that rule here. No buttons buttoned on the shirts that hang in our closets. We might be lazy, but I prefer to think of it as efficiency. Your mileage may vary.

Sharkbytes said...

If you don't do the top button it will hang poorly and then get smushed into a mess by the other shirts and half of the reason for doing the laundry will be defeated. It will, however, still be clean.

vanilla said...

Grace, seems to be considerable support for her position.

Chuck, 'fraid I won't get much mileage atall with that hereabouts.

Sharkey, aha! It would still be clean.

Shelly said...

You are a wise husband to realize the benefits of the trade off.

vanilla said...

Shelly, oh, yes. Indeed I come out on the better end of the deal.

Sailorcurt said...

Excuse me? She dictates to you the way you'll hang your own clothes after you do your own laundry?


The rule in our house is you get it done one of two ways:

1. Your way


2. By me

The two options are mutually exclusive. You want it done your way, very simple: do it yourself.

The interesting thing is, you already ARE doing it yourself.

I don't like to have buttons buttoned on my shirts because it makes it harder to get them out of the closet.

When my wife does my laundry, she buttons the top two buttons. I dislike the practice, but I don't complain a bit because I'm just grateful to her for having done my laundry and saving me the effort.

If I don't like having the buttons buttoned, I can always do it myself.

But to have to do it yourself ANYWAY and STILL have to put up with doing it in a way you don't like.


I sure hope she's rewarding you lavishly ways.

vanilla said...

Sailorcurt, and I thought my friends who chide me for doing kitchen cleanup were touchy.
Truth: She does laundry more often than I do.
More truth: I wrote the little piece in fun (though I, like you, do not like to have to unbutton a shirt to get it out of the closet.)
Ultimate truth: I am more than amply rewarded.

Sailorcurt said...

I know it doesn't come across in print, but I wrote my entire comment with a smile on my face. (I'm smiling now too).

Hey, everyone has to find their own ways of making a relationship work. What works for me may not be right for you and vice versa.

I just thought the admission about your shirt buttoning lifestyle choices deserved a little good light-hearted ribbing.

Sorry if it didn't come across as light-hearted as I'd intended.

Sailorcurt said...

I'm not surprised at all that you consider yourself to be "more than amply rewarded".

Based solely on your past posts and glowing commentary about your better half, I'd have to wholeheartedly agree.

vanilla said...

Sailorcurt, I assumed you had written your comments in good natured fun, and I hoped that my riposte was in good fun, too. No apology necessary. I think we understand each other. (And as men well-experienced in marriage we may understand women better than they think, or better than we let on.)