Little Old Woman and Little Old Man #T

Little scriblets by little old man during their last summer together.  Published elsewhere and gathered here for preservation. 

Little old woman and little old man Cooked their eggs in a frying pan  Took a spin on their tandem wheel And saw the world all too real  Everything a terrible sight Gave them both an awful fright  Back home they hung their jammies on the posts of the beds And pulled the covers over their heads.

Little old woman and little old man  Rock side by side whenever they can  Cracker Barrel veranda or their own place  Life is just better when you slow the pace  What's the big hurry  Why rush and worry  Sufficient unto the day are the cares that we bear  Tomorrow's woes will arrive when we're there  If we live that long 

Little old woman and little old man  Arose from bed turned off the fan  Splashed some water on their faces Headed out to see the races  The horses were huge the bets were small  But still they managed to lose it all  It's not what you bet that makes you lose  But that you bet so try to choose  An entertainment less taxing And your life will be more relaxing

Little old woman  said little old man  Let's go for a ride I think we can  So they got in the car and drove a short way  Let's look and see what we see today  On their right they saw the Moose and on the left the calaboose Into the country and guess what they saw  Corn and soybeans and soybeans and corn  The killdeer flew up and the crow said Caw  And Soybeans and corn and corn and beans  And little old man out the window leans  And shouts  Hoo Rah for Indiana

Little old woman and little old man on Sunday night  Sitting together everything is all right  She reads from the Bible old man listening    For old woman will turn to him her eyes glistening  And ask him a question to test his attention  One thing he gets and feels really blessed  Is that our sins are covered by the blood  We've passed the test  When we believe and confess The Lord  And let Him guide us through His Word.

Little old man said little old woman, Let's go for a ride and no more than said it  And the skies opened wide  It poured and it rained it rained and it poured  The lightning flashed and the thunder roared  It poured some more but then the skies cleared  Look it's sunny not so bad as I feared  Put on the shoes got in the car But had gone only this far When on our own street we ran into this  Literally. [street covered with water knee deep]  We went for a ride anyway.

Little old woman said little old man They are coming to take us away Who When  They Today They are coming to take us away  Hey hey They build cell towers they scramble our brains  They will mess us up worse than derailed trains  There is no escaping They know where we are  They know when we sneeze or get in the car  It's a hopeless case I tell ya Ma  Whether or not we zig zag or yaw  They gonna get us if we hang around here  Oh Wait Maybe SpaceX will take us there  There  Where  Right there he said pointing to the moon  What I think she said is that you are a loon.

Little old man had a birthday today  Little old woman said keep getting older you'll be ancient one day  You are already an antique--mm What rhymes with antique   Never mind you're just an old codger  Here have some more beans and corn dodger. 

Little old woman said, Please button my shirt. But, said little old man, my fingers hurt. They got the job done Though it takes two to do the task of one.

.Little old woman and little old man sit side by side The hour is getting late and I'm sleepy, he said.Well, I'm not, little old lady replied. So he lets his head loll and the shades drop over his eyes. Get up, he hears her say, I don't think it's wise To sleep in your chair until break of day. So he'll get up and toddle to bed but will he sleep then?  Nay.  What light through yon window breaks? Why, it is the sun, he awakes. Nay, not so, for little old man's prophecy came true And no matter clouds or sunlight this day is bound to be blue.

Life in the slow lane--  I heard a young woman mutter, Get out of my way. Yep, My Way, as though she owns the store And the aisle and probably more.