Monday, December 14, 2015


Yes, I am writing about lettuce.  The vegetable kind, for though I have heard on occasion someone or other refer to money as "lettuce."  I never really ever had enough of that to write about.  But I am blessed in that I have always been able to obtain sufficient resources to provide food and shelter for those dependent upon me.

Lettuce.  Daddy used to plant "leaf lettuce" which then became the earliest provender from the garden.  In her turn, Mama made a dish she called "wilted lettuce."  She marinated the lettuce in a broth of vinegar and sugar and bacon grease, hot bacon grease, thus wilted lettuce.  I never cared for the stuff, but one seldom complained.  Food was food and "beggars cannot be choosers" and so on and so forth.  "Rather than whine about what you don't have, appreciate what you do have."  I could write a book.

As I became an adult and could within limits choose my own comestibles, I grew fond of iceberg lettuce.  I like the crisp, cool leaves, the crunch when masticated.  Spare me wilted, droopy lettuce.  While we are at it, spare me spiky, prickly lettuce.  My motto:  If it isn't iceberg, it isn't lettuce.
You may spare me the nutrition lessons and all that.  I want the leaf on my cheeseburger or the bed for my banana and Hellmann's® salad to provide the "crunch" which would otherwise be missing.

All this to register a complaint.  Complaint?  "Whatsoever your lot, therewith be content."  Okay for my lot, but not for my lettuce.  Recently the purchases of the luscious-looking heads have yielded floppy, droopy leaves lacking crispy crunch.  Reminds me of Mom's servings those many decades ago.  And useless on my hamburger.


Grace said...

Looks like you have a nice variety of lettuces in there. I like the crunchy part of romaine and Geo likes the soft floppy part so we were always good with that. I happen to like chicory maybe because it's what I grew up on, and frisee. I've also developed a taste for butter lettuce - interesting taste and texture. Hot bacon fat on raw spinach=spinach salad (you're supposed to throw in the bacon as part of the salad). While the cool crunch of iceberg is nice, it's not one of my favs.

Secondary Roads said...

We don't do iceberg lettuce in this house. Romaine, kale, New Zealand spinach and chard provide variety, flavor and nutrition.

Vee said...

I loved Mom's wilted lettuce. With the bacon grease, sugar, and vinegar, it qualified as a sweet/sour dish. Anything that is sweet/sour is on my list of likes.

Iceberg lettuce is the only food to which I have an allergy. Not severe though which is good because I love it and eat it a lot.

vanilla said...

Grace, isn't it wonderful that there is a lettuce for nearly everyone's taste?

Chuck, I like the stuff you named. Except the romaine. I use spinach in a salad. Kale, chard, beet greens, turnip greens, etc. I prefer cooked a bit.

Vee, so you are the one she made it for!

Vee said...

It's obvious I was the favorite.

Grace said...

LOL @Vee

vanilla said...

Vee, Mom always did like you best.

Grace, score another one for the ladies.

Lin said...

I don't like iceberg--no real flavor and void of nutrients. I prefer the droopy stuff, I guess--IF I eat lettuce at all. I'm not big on salads for some reason.

vanilla said...

Lin, it's the cool crunch!